So Old Hot Friend DOES like me. This came about at Club R@ven on Friday night. Go me! He walked me home when fourteen gazillion vodka redbulls became too much and I had to ditch the girls. Um, much making out was done and he ended up staying the night. Maybe fortunately some of what happened is not remembered by me. I think I was acting like a bit of jerk however. He left early because he had something wrong with his contacts…but left his number on my living room table.

I of course roll over in bed as soon as I hear the door shut and text Mr. Florida because “I’m all alone in my big empty bed and I miss him.” Yes, cecause I’m diabolical – this I know. It’s 8 a.m. and I’m already playing a guy. He surprisingly texted back and plans were made for that evening. I slept off a hangover all day.

So he arrives that evening, we walk around under the beautiful big moon down my lovely tree lined midtown streets. Have a drink at Kasbhah’s outdoor patio amongst the Too Hip Crowd. He stays over. Sunday we spend together and drive up the river and happen upon a great outdoor bar overlooking the water twinkling in the afternoon sun. Have many beers and listen to the cover band doing the Stones.

I roped him into dinner at my parent’s house because they’d invited me earlier in the week. It was too lovely. Too nice to have a great guy there at my ‘rents sharing the food and fun and conversation and so I drank waaaaaay too much wine. He’s everything good about the ex without any of the ex’s bad. Why did I do that to myself? I definitely don’t want the ex back or that life, but having a great guy be part of my family for a night was emotionally a bit much. Especially considering I’m really falling for him. And he’s gone, permanently-gone tomorrow. We’re probably getting together tonight, but after that, that’s it. No more. And it’s heartbreaking.

Sure…I’m not certain I’m ready for a relationship. And I might be just thinking he’s perfect because he is leaving and I don’t have to look at the bad. Or if he was staying if he’d even still keep seeing me. And I’m having fun playing the field (see Friday night.) But, I can’t help the big lump I’m feeling in my chest. The sense of loss.

And of course, Mr. Breakup from the prior weekend left me a v/m last night saying “bye” as he’d be out of town for a while. I suppose that is what friends do, but talk about weird mixed signals.

Boys, boys, boys.